Happy is an understatement of how I feel being able to share this post with you my lovely readers before the year ends. When my friend told me to check my mail I kept wondering what could she have sent. The last thing I expected was such a write-up which I can totally agree will have us all thinking of the changes to make come 2016. So please read and feel free to add your two cents.


Have you ever been in a particular situation where someone keeps pulling you back but you can’t let go of the person because you’d feel guilty? Most times we know what is bad for us or what is stopping us from reaching the next level but can’t let go of that person or thing in our lives, because of pity. There are several situations in our lives that can pull us back or slow us down. They can be referred to as anchors. These anchors could be a boy friend or a girl friend or just a friend or a bad habit. Sometimes, a person can be an anchor in his or her own life, whether knowingly or unknowingly. 
You see, there are many achievements in life and our Father in heaven has blessed each and every one of us with different gifts to attain great heights.  Now there are various ways we can achieve this but that’s not my main concern today. (Figure that out yourself) Today I’m more concerned about what’s stopping us from moving forward. Let me give an illustration; Simbi is an average student in school. She’s not a dull student but still needs help. Now Simbi’s best friend Ali is not on the bright side and is very unserious with his school work. Ali needs all the help he can get to pass but doesn’t want to put in work. Simbi wants to help her best friend by all means but still has to get help from the class nerds. In the end, Simbi fails due to one simple fact. She didn’t have time to study because she was busy carrying Ali along. 
It is easy to identify the anchor in Simbi’s life as Ali. Because she was so busy carrying Ali along she forgot about her own needs. Now don’t get me wrong. The lesson here isn’t that you shouldn’t help others, no! If Ali was serious with his studies, Simbi would not have failed because they would have studied together and taught each other. The lesson here however is that sometimes you have to be stingy with yourself if you want to go far in life. Don’t let people pull you back. In the end, you end up losing! Nobody wants/likes to lose! 

Many of us are still with the wrong guy or girl cos we are afraid of being single. So we rather stay with the wrong person cos we are comfortable. Sometimes being comfortable doesn’t mean you are happy. If you have 10 friends and can’t do business with any, then you are in the wrong circle. A girl dating a drug addict/alcoholic  will one day be pulled into that life. Some of people are afraid to shine or show their talents because  others will feel they are proud! That just means the person has friends with inferior complex! Your success should motivate people around you and not make them uncomfortable. A guy dating a runs babe cos she buys him expensive gifts may end up getting AIDS or something else. A girl/guy dating someone they can’t marry is only wasting his/her time! Having friends you can’t learn anything from is useless. Moving around with some certain friends keeps us stagnant.
We were not created to be stagnant. As God’s creation we were made to keep improving ourselves! We were created for a function and not for fashion.
Nobody likes an old model of anything. If that was the case we would all be content using nokia 3310 or Motorola pebble! Lol!  You don’t want to meet a friend you lost contact with ten years later and be the same way they left you! That’s why it is important to decongest our lives and get rid of the people, things or habits that are slowing us down. Don’t let the fear of losing someone keep you from exploring and building yourself (Got this quote from cinderella story but changed it up a bit) . A ship in the harbour is safe but that’s not why ships are built – John A Shedd. Ships were built to stand storms! Think of yourself as a ship today. Move against the wind because ships move faster when they go against the wind.  Don’t get comfortable with being stagnant. (The reality of life though, is that some people don’t even know that their lives are stagnant! But that’s a story for another day.) Make that leap today! Sometimes God blesses us, not in what he gives but what he takes away. Don’t be whining about something that left you when deep down you know, you really didn’t need it.
This topic is more than important at this time of the year. Everyone’s gearing up for the new year and making different plans for it. In 2016, don’t let “unnecessary” anchors of life pull you down. Make important friends. People you can actually gain from and in turn they’ll gain from you too. Let the lessons be a two-way street. If you keep gaining without giving back, then they will DROP you too!! You don’t have to be Albert Einstein to impact knowledge! Better yourself. Sometimes we only attract similar minds to ourselves. So don’t be wondering why you haven’t met Dangote when you aren’t doing things to meet Dangote! Invest in yourself! Nobody is going to invest in an empty person. I’m happy to be writing this because I know someone out there has gained from this. 2016 is our year to shine and God helping us we will!! Thanks and stay blessed!!

 Anonymous 😀 


Losing someone can have a toll on anyone, be it a friend or family member, it always comes like a shock. Sometimes it feels like our world came trembling down. It takes the grace of God to recover from some loses and at the end, we learn to cherish the memories we shared with them.

I was getting ready to go to the movies with my friends when I got a bbm notification, I didn’t want to chat so I called instead since it had been a while we had spoken. But the person that picked wasn’t her, it was her sister. There and then, I panicked and asked about my dear friend praying nothing was wrong. Her sister told me she wasn’t feeling well, I asked for the house address that I was going to the movies now and when I was done I would definitely drop by but was told to call when I was done because they might not be home cause they were contemplating taking her to the hospital.

That phone call kept replaying in my head, Why would my friend message me and immediately I call back, he sister picks up and tells me she is ill. I was tempted to cancel the movie and go see her but as usual I told myself well I could always see her after the movie (Never! Never underestimate your instincts). At the movies, the movie got delayed for more than an hour (technical issues). Again I was tempted to leave but every time I kept telling  myself I would still go after the movie. Finally the movie started and ended, I tried the number but it was switched off. Shit! How will i do this now, I didn’t have any other person’s number and I only knew the area where the house was but not the house.

I went home telling myself i will try again the next morning so I could go see her. Next morning, I wake up, say my prayer and open my phone to check bbm updates there written boldly was want I dreaded the most, RIP Semira! God knows how I prayed that morning when I saw that status, I prayed that let that Semira not be my dear friend, I refused to believe it could be her. Immediately I called a mutual friend. The pain that pierced my heart when she said it was her, I truly can’t begin to explain. I felt like I had let her down, I felt like she had called me to tell me how she was feeling and I ignored it. I found my way to her house that morning and I was told she had given up around 3.00am that morning. and as I was just getting there that was when they took her body to go lay to rest(Muslim traditions).

I later asked her sister how come she messaged me at of the blues, she told me she discovered we were chatting some weeks back and she hand’t replied me so she felt she should. People started talking about how she knew she was going to leave soon due to her twitter messages, I went to her timeline and read through. The messages I saw was of one who was going through so much pain, I still can’t believe how I missed them, how i never saw any of her messages all through her sickness. For a week I kept asking myself what if?, What if I had gone when I made that call, What if I had cancelled the movie, Would things have be different?… I will never know. Everyday I pray for her soul, I hold on to our memories, our talks of losing weight, getting married and starting a family. I remember our gwags struggles and every-time, I thank God for bringing such a friend to my life because even though her life was cut short, she definitely left a mark.

We have all lost someone who’s death has affected us in ways we never imagined, we cried and cried and asked so many questions why things had to be the way things were. Some of us have been so affected by a lose to the extent we completely shut out of life. I am not saying it is easy, It never is, all I am saying is we should learn to appreciate everything we have now, thank God everyday, live life and be at peace with yourself and most of all stay happy because nobody knows what tomorrow holds so start appreciating today.

May the souls of all the faithful departed continue to rest in peace.